This morning I acknowledge the tug of war within. Part of me wants to move forward, stepping into all I believe God has for my future. At the same time, another part of me holds back. On April 13, 2018, The man I was married to for 38 years died in his sleep. He was just 61. It’s been…
In His presence is fullness of joy…” Psalm 16:11 Yesterday marked an extraordinary moment in the timeline of my story. I am a storyteller—and although I love telling other people’s stories, the story I’m most qualified to talk about is my own. On October 3rd, 2005, I was transported to the hospital because of severe chest pain. After performing…
In a few hours, I will face another series of “firsts.” My first Thanksgiving without my husband. My first time getting together with several members of his family in Chicago—Charlie’s absence acutely obvious. On top of that, Friday would have been his sixty-second birthday. I’ve shed more than a few tears these past few days. None of this is…
I woke quite early the day of my husband’s visitation. I’d spent the night in my sibling’s hotel room, who both had come to support me after Charlie’s sudden death. Slipping quietly from the room, I headed for the lobby. Finding a chair in front of the fireplace, I scooted closer to its warmth, trying to ward off the…
This past week has been painful. Facing the first Fourth of July without Charlie was particularly difficult. A day I would have spent with my husband. Perhaps taking a long drive, then barbequing and inviting our children and grandchildren over to eat and hang out. Although I was not alone, I couldn’t escape the waves of loneliness and grief…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtXttbkDnHE It’s been two months since I learned my wonderful husband of thirty-eight years, Charlie Farrell, died in his sleep. He was sixty-one years old. The call came at five a.m. When my phone first rang beside the hotel bed I quickly declined it, not recognizing the number. But when it rang again, this time with a dear friend’s…
